Fixing a sexless marriage is something we work on every day in our coaching with men.
Falling In Love Is Easy. Staying In Love and Keeping the Passion and Intimacy Alive, That’s The Hard Part
Sex is an incredibly important way for couples to have fun together, to build trust and emotional connection. If there’s very little or no sex in your marriage, rest assured there is help and there is hope!
We deal with these questions, and many more just like them, about sex and intimacy in long term relationships all day, every day. The first questions I want to answer for you are:
Yes a sexless marriage can survive
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First things first, a sexless marriage can survive, although it’s hard to find information and statistics about how many sexless relationships survive and recapture their spark. I can assure you from years of coaching men in sexless marriages that it’s possible and they certainly do not all end in divorce (although sometimes that’s the right choice to make after you’ve exhausted all other options).
Sex issues in a relationship are complex. So many personal behaviour and self worth issues are involved. Then throw in a lack of education and modelling of good relating skills and you can easily understand why we end up in a dance of avoidance, walking on eggshells, building frustration and resentment, but over and over again I see that underneath it all, both partners really want the same thing – a loving, connected, trusting, affectionate marriage – they just need some help and support to get there.
Getting some help and support for your sexless marriage is especially important when partners seem to have different levels of interest in sex. Distress, resentment, and a sense of betrayal or deprivation can slowly corrode the trust and affection between you which, if not addressed, seriously impacts the chances of your marriage surviving.
The first step to fixing or repairing your sexless marriage is admitting that there is a problem. The path to becoming a confident, happy and sexually satisfied lover starts with accepting the truth of where you are now.
Whether you consider a low-sex or no-sex marriage an issue is something that you and your partner will need to discuss and find agreement on in terms of wanting and being willing to re-igniting this essential part of your relationship and connection.
Signs that you may be in a low-sex relationship or sexless marriage
- You aren’t having sex regularly with your partner
- One of you has developed feelings for someone else
- Other parts of your life take priority over your relationship and intimacy
- You’ve given up trying to be attractive for each other
- You go to bed at different times
- Your sex life is non existent
- You don’t ever talk about sex
- If you do talk about sex it becomes an argument and ends in more distance, sometimes for days or even weeks
Sexless marriage coaching & support
If you’re unsure whether you need a coach, a sex therapist, or couples therapy, arrange a free consultation call with us – it’s not a sales call, it’s a free 90 minute coaching session. We have a value of being honest and only working with men who are ready to take the next step in developing their self confidence. If you’re in need of therapy rather than coaching, we’re always honest and will let you know.