divorce | Good Guys 2 Great Men

My Wife Abuses Me, What Should I Do?

I may lose a few subscribers with this article…but it must be done. My hope for this message is to challenge and empower you to think differently about feeling offended, insulted, manipulated, controlled or abused. The internet abounds with countless experts trying to help people know when they are being abused and how to escape their evil perpetrators. These experts arm them with tips, tools and vocabulary to identify their manipulative, controlling, domineering and narcissistic abusers. “Abuse” is the new relationship battle cry and public enemy #1. It’s creating armies of otherwise healthy men and women who spend a LOT of time and energy indicting their persecutors. Then they spend … Continue reading →

FREE Live Tribe Brotherhood Group Calls

It’s a very simple concept. Men need other men for support, guidance, encouragement and brotherly love. Period. And especially when sh*t hits the fan…say… like a global pandemic, we need each other more than ever. That’s why we are continuing our free, live men’s group support Zoom calls for connection, conversation, sharing and laughing. Every week, one of our coaches from all over the world will be hosting a 90-minute session. The coaches will introduce a topic to kick things off, but we want YOU to be a part of the conversation, so bring your questions and concerns to the brotherhood. This is open to ANY MAN reading this…not just … Continue reading →

Why Is My Wife No Longer Attracted To Me?

I’m seeing a very clear and amusing trend in many of the men in my community. What is it? INCREASED SEX APPEAL. What’s this, you ask? Let me answer that with a short story. A while back at one of my men’s bi-weekly meetings in Fort Collins, a guy told us of an interaction with his girlfriend. It came time for him to leave that evening for our men’s meeting and he said, “Oh, I need to get going, I’ve got a meeting to get to.” She said, “What meeting?” He reminded her, “I have my men’s group every two weeks. I mentioned it to you before. Tonight’s our night.” … Continue reading →

Why Won’t My Wife Talk To Me Anymore?

“We were having a great time and then all of a sudden I could see her shutting down. What can I do when that happens?” We hear this question all the time from the men in our community. Sometimes it sounds like… “She spends so much time in her room not engaging with me or the kids, how can I help her to reconnect with us?” It’s a common issue when a relationship is under pressure, maybe there’s a tension or a tentativeness that’s crept into your connection and suddenly all those thoughts that strike fear into your heart and put a knot in your gut start racing through your … Continue reading →

Wife Wants to Divorce, I Feel Like I’m Dying, Help!

Two years ago I spent an intense hour talking with a frantic guy who was facing divorce. I never heard from him again…until this week. His email was fairly short and to the point. “I talked to you probably 2 years ago. Didn’t move forward with any counseling. Ended up with a divorce. In the divorce I gave her everything. Then there was a house fire where I moved and I lost the little I had rebuilt. Then a car crash totaled my car . Guess what? I didn’t die. It sucked. But i didn’t die.” I love the simplicity of this realization. He didn’t die. Yep, it sucked. But … Continue reading →

How to Make the Hardest Decision of Your Life

Each day I day talk to men on the hairy edge of making a decision. They may be stuck in the “Limbo Land” of a marriage that is spiraling out of control with no resolution in sight. Or they may feel trapped in a job or career that is sucking their soul out of their body on a daily basis. Or they want to speak their truth to somebody so badly it’s eating them alive and keeping them in a dark, angry place. How do you make a hard decision? How do you break free from the fear of outcome and the fear of someone’s reaction? The answer is to … Continue reading →

Why Does My Wife Avoid Me?

Does your wife or girlfriend sometimes act like she would rather be anywhere on this planet but with you? Does this get under your skin and make you boiling mad? Do you feel hurt, unappreciated and ignored? Let’s talk about how men, women (and horses, of course) feel the PRESSURE to get away. Let’s talk about how we can reduce the pressure and create an environment where softness, relaxation and closer INTIMACY is possible. Watch or listen to this video to find out WHAT we do to cause this and what it looks and sounds like. Then below I’ll talk about WHY we do this and how change things up. … Continue reading →

She Needs Space – Don’t React Like This!

The three words that make your neck hairs stand up and your gut tighten into nauseous knots are… “I need space!” I’ve talked a lot in videos about this issue, like here…and here. Those videos talk about what to think about her request for space and how to know whether it’s really a request for divorce. This article is about the PRESSURE she feels and the distinction between the BAD pressure you must stop and the GOOD pressure you must start. Even if you wind up divorced, you must understand the difference and become a master of applying GOOD pressure – everywhere in your life. Let me explain this in … Continue reading →

Is Trust Causing The Disconnection In Your Marriage?

Have you ever heard these phrases about TRUST? “In God We Trust…all others must bring cash.” “I don’t trust anyone unless they EARN IT!” “I trusted you and then you broke my heart!” When it comes to relationships we must decide if trust is a starting point or an end result. Is trust something you can give even when you’re not sure it’s “deserved”? Brené Brown quotes Charles Feltman, author of “The Thin Book of Trust”, who describes trust as “choosing to risk making something you value vulnerable to another person’s actions.” Meanwhile, distrust is deciding that “what is important to me is not safe with this person in this … Continue reading →

My Wife Says “You need to work on yourself”

From 1999 to 2005 I owned and operated a Bed & Breakfast (and Horse Hotel) in the mountains of northern Colorado. Many of my guests were from a large Buddhist retreat center about a mile down the road. These were people seriously into “personal growth work” and many were repeat guests. They learned how to meditate, how to be mindful, how to be kind to themselves, how to witness their own thoughts and how to end their suffering by detaching from their desires…and lots of other cool stuff. In fact, if you read much of the stuff I write about that cool stuff may sound oddly similar. Most personal development … Continue reading →