attraction | Good Guys 2 Great Men

My Wife Abuses Me, What Should I Do?

I may lose a few subscribers with this article…but it must be done. My hope for this message is to challenge and empower you to think differently about feeling offended, insulted, manipulated, controlled or abused. The internet abounds with countless experts trying to help people know when they are being abused and how to escape their evil perpetrators. These experts arm them with tips, tools and vocabulary to identify their manipulative, controlling, domineering and narcissistic abusers. “Abuse” is the new relationship battle cry and public enemy #1. It’s creating armies of otherwise healthy men and women who spend a LOT of time and energy indicting their persecutors. Then they spend … Continue reading →

Why Is My Wife No Longer Attracted To Me?

I’m seeing a very clear and amusing trend in many of the men in my community. What is it? INCREASED SEX APPEAL. What’s this, you ask? Let me answer that with a short story. A while back at one of my men’s bi-weekly meetings in Fort Collins, a guy told us of an interaction with his girlfriend. It came time for him to leave that evening for our men’s meeting and he said, “Oh, I need to get going, I’ve got a meeting to get to.” She said, “What meeting?” He reminded her, “I have my men’s group every two weeks. I mentioned it to you before. Tonight’s our night.” … Continue reading →

She Needs Space – Don’t React Like This!

The three words that make your neck hairs stand up and your gut tighten into nauseous knots are… “I need space!” I’ve talked a lot in videos about this issue, like here…and here. Those videos talk about what to think about her request for space and how to know whether it’s really a request for divorce. This article is about the PRESSURE she feels and the distinction between the BAD pressure you must stop and the GOOD pressure you must start. Even if you wind up divorced, you must understand the difference and become a master of applying GOOD pressure – everywhere in your life. Let me explain this in … Continue reading →

Why Has My Wife Stopped Wanting Sex With Me?

The topic for today’s article is one of the most common questions we get asked and one of the biggest sources of frustration for men in their marriage or long term relationship. Why doesn’t she initiate intimacy? Why do I have to do everything to make this a relationship rather than just a platonic friendship? How can she be happy without an intimate connection? What can I do to change this? Our first response is always to look into how you THINK about your current situation. Most of the time you’re so focused on what she says or what you think she’s thinking that you have no idea what’s really … Continue reading →

My Wife Said I’m Controlling, What Do I Do Now?

Sometimes we get our best ideas at the most awkward times…like on the toilet. There I was, reading an old issue of Rolling Stones magazine and an interview with the late Glenn Frey of the band The Eagles. My favorite band of all time, by the way. Anyway, I read a quote he made during an interview and it gave me a flash of insight – an idea – and there was no pen in sight. The interviewer commented how amazing it was that the band could so closely reproduce in live concert the perfect vocal harmonies and instrumentation they achieved on their records. Glenn said, “Yeah, with so many … Continue reading →

How Overreacting Reduces the Affection in Your Marriage

I say this about 20 times a week. STAY IN YOUR LANE, BROTHER! I say it to men who are stumbling into negativity, dark thoughts and unnecessary conflict. But what does it mean? It means to stop driving into the drama created by others. It means to stop believing every bad day is a sign that something is wrong. And when things are going great, don’t get caught up in believing they will always be great. Life is an experience of ups and downs…highs and lows. But if you don’t know where YOUR LANE is, you’ll drive all over the freaking road feeling out of control…a victim of circumstances. If … Continue reading →

Turn Your Angry Wife Into a Purring Pussycat

Since I don’t have kids, I don’t normally give much parenting advice. Although the “man skills” I teach are totally transferable to parenting nothing beats a great true story to illustrate a point. My buddy, Jeff, told me a story today about his unruly 15-year-old who went ballistic when Jeff took his phone away. I don’t just mean ballistic. I mean all out warfare. What do you do when someone with a 15-year-old mindset and maturity does something so outrageous that you feel like throwing him through a wall? I found out the answer today when Jeff shared this great story. I love how he handled it. Jeff Allen is … Continue reading →

How to Initiate Sex and Not Get Rejected

This article may piss off a few people…but I don’t care. Tough love is hard to swallow and I’ve had to swallow my fair share. When is the BEST time to ask a woman for sex? Answer: When you don’t NEED it. The worst time to ask for a job, a loan, a date or sex is when you desperately think you NEED it. People smell this a mile away and it shows up in your eyes, your voice, your body and even the muscles in your jaw. Too simple you say? I think not. This is a UNIVERSAL principle that applies in nearly every facet of life, business and … Continue reading →

Become More Attractive to Your Wife By Stopping This One Thing

An everyday conversation with a wishy-washy person. You: Hey man, I have 3 tickets for the playoff game this Saturday at 1pm. I want you to take the 3rd ticket and come with Bill and I. I’m driving and can pick you up at 11am. It’s going to be a blast. Do you want to join us? Wishy-Washy Friend: “Umm…yeah…that sounds pretty good…I think…umm thanks…I mean…that should probably work…I guess…lemme see…umm…yeah.” What’s my point here? Don’t be that guy. Nobody likes that guy. Nobody. I’m not talking about being uncertain when someone asks, Do you know the surface temperature of the sun? If you don’t know something then saying NO … Continue reading →

How Can I Save My Marriage? and Why it’s the Wrong Question to Ask

There’s a “chicken and the egg” situation I want to address right here…right now. And this is crucial to HOW YOU THINK about getting what you want in life and relationships. How you think about everything is the only control you have and all you will ever need. Why? Because the moment you change the way you think about the things happening in your life…those very things will start changing in front of your eyes. I’m in the business of helping men CHANGE THEIR PERSPECTIVE about what it means to be a man. I teach them HOW TO THINK differently. What causes us to become needy, dependent and afraid in … Continue reading →