My Wife Has Disconnected From Our Marriage

Are you feeling like your wife has disconnected from your marriage? I speak to a lot of men who are unhappy and in pain because of the state of their intimate relationship.

Men who are dealing with the pain of lack of connection and affection, lack of attraction and desire, lack of trust and respect, impending divorce or separation…

I’m also very lucky to speak to a lot of men who are happy and loving life.

So what’s the difference? How do you go from the pain to happiness?

Free Guide: Where You Should Focus To Grow Your Masculinity >>

For a man to move from unhappy to happy, from disconnected to connected, from distrust to trust, from a blue balled, sex starved man to an unashamedly fun, flirtatious and satisfied man, the first thing he must do is understand how to see the path to a different future.

A future where he doesn’t waste his time and energy on trying to change what he doesn’t want and puts that energy into immediately creating what he does want.

Being in a relationship filled with passion, connection and affection must start with how you think about yourself first.

If you are like most men (myself included), you’ve likely spent a lot of time wondering how to get more of what you want in your marriage.

This means that we end up thinking about how to fix things, how to identify the root cause of the problem and implement the solution.

Simple eh?

But there’s a design floor in how we’re approaching the problem which means we’re never going to find the solution. Ever.

We’re always looking at what we don’t want as the cause of our problem.

We’re always seeing the solution as fixing what’s wrong.

She’s just not attracted to me.

She’s always to busy with other stuff to make time for us.

She cares more about the kids and her work than our relationship.

We’re just not compatible.

You can’t control other people or the situation you’re in. All you can control is yourself, your attitude, your perspective, your decisions and your actions.

So the truth you need to hear right now is that even if your circumstances improve and that pain and suffering goes away while you’re fixing what’s wrong, there will always be another time when your circumstances change again and then you’ll be right back where you started – needing to control what you can’t control.

When it comes to getting what we want, there’s a Jedi mind trick that changes everything.

There’s a moment in our coaching when a man goes from thinking, wondering and worrying about how he’s going to get what he wants, to CREATING, LEADING and INVITING her to share the enjoyment of experiences he’s loving making happen.

It’s a fundamental perception change and many men describe being able to feel it when it changes – almost perceptably like a switch flipping.

It’s simple, but not easy.

If it was easy, every guy would already be in a deeply connected, loving, passionate relationship, and divorce rates would be much much lower.

Your transformation is from expecting things and people to change for you to be happy to expecting yourself to change and that that process of change is actually incredibly fun, exciting and rewarding.

When you choose to change yourself, you are making a statement of self trust.

You instantly feel better.

In fact this week a man reached out to me and just that process of choosing to reach out, making a decision purely for him, led onto a difficult conversation with his wife which changed everything for him.

The knot in his gut dissolved, the pain and frustration evaporated and he could breath again, he could eat a meal again.

He could start making decisions based on who he is as a man, what he believes in, what he wants for himself and his children.

His whole view of his future changed in an instant and opened right up. Now, instead of seeing problems, he can see opportunities.

He also said he suddenly felt his self respect, his self belief, his self confidence, his control over his emotions, his connection to his environment and the people in it shift too.

And now he can’t wait to share who he is with the world.

All because of a perspective shift.

All because he made a decision for him.

He’s no longer waiting for life to be different, he’s enthusiastic about BECOMING different every day.

When you discover the power of your choice in any moment, you can start to give what you want rather than trying to get it and you learn how to consistently expect that you use this power again and again whenever you’re faced with difficult circumstances.

There’s something else that happens when men truly get this.

Women see you in a new attractive light.

It’s like you have morphed into that man that other guys envy and women adore.

It had nothing to do with what other people were doing or not doing to you and everything to do with how you think about yourself and your ability to choose your perspective.

You are no longer an unattractive, adolescent minded guy who’s emotional and physical satisfaction are controlled by others and what you can get from them.

You’re now a man who now knows that your old pain and sadness came from a place of weakness.

Your new strength is an aura of masculine confidence which allows you to unapologetically make decisions that create opportunities to experience what you want.

Now THAT is attractive!

So my question for you is…

Do you take up the challenge to focus on what is and prioritise yourself and your (very attractive power) to choose what you want to give to this moment?

I guarantee it will completely transform all your relationships, your opportunities, your clarity, your direction, your motivation…pretty much everything in your life.

Join our group coaching and get to talk to other men who have been through the pain you’re experiencing right now and come out the other side, more confident, more deliberate and with new skills that enable them to create a totally different future.

Or fill in our inquiry form for a completely free, life changing conversation with me where we go deep into what’s really causing the disconnection in your relationship and what you can do immediately to change what happens next.

author avatar
Dan Dore Certified Professional Men’s Coach
Dan Dore is a certified professional Men’s Coach specialising in helping men who are struggling and feeling unhappy and unfulfilled i their life and relationships. With over 20,000 hours experience coaching men to completely resolve their self-esteem and confidence issues and improve their ability to create emotional connection, build trust, earn respect, and lead the sexual intimacy and affection in their relationship whenever they want. No more fearing rejection or other people’s opinion of you - I want to help you finally be happy in yourself and trust your ability to create anything you want in your future.

Frequently Asked Questions


Is our coaching right for you?

Our coaching process was created for men who want to feel happier and more fulfilled in their life and relationships. We teach you how to have more confidence and clarity about what you want in your life and create an action plan to start making it happen.

Do you only work with men in marriage?

While our coaching teaches you how to create a more connected, more fun and passionate marriage, we also work with you to have more clarity, enthusiasm and fulfillment in all areas of your life. We help you understand what you really want your future to look like and we also teach you how to be in control of your emotions so that you can be confident and assertive no matter how difficult your circumstances are right now .

What happens in the free 90-minute coaching call?

In our free initial coaching calls, we listen a lot, we ask you questions to understand what life is really like for you at the moment, we help you identify what you want to be different and what's holding you back from creating those changes now. Then we help you create a practical plan of action to start moving forward straight away.

What will I learn in your coaching programs?

We take you through a process to:

  • Stop being tentative and become more focused and directed.
  • Develop control over your thoughts and emotions like never before.
  • Become a master of the masculine and feminine dance required for a more passionate connection in your romantic relationships.
  • Build and sustain your personal masculine confidence so that you don't get "triggered" or feel disrespected and can respond with strength and confidence to any situation.
  • Become more connected, aware and present with everyone (this is a critical step in your ability to build attraction and desire as well as have people trust you and respect you more).
  • Stop the destructive emotions of anger and resentment which keep you going around in frustrating cycles and start from moving forward with purpose.
  • Stop being anxious, needy and overly reliant upon other people's opinions and approval of you and start feeling more peace, happiness and a deep sense of being a man who is confident in himself again.
  • You will become a confident man who knows his values, what he wants and where he’s going in his life.
  • You will learn how to think, speak and act according to your values without worrying about reactions from others.
  • You become clear and confident in your ability to create intimacy whenever you want.
  • Your confidence will be something that you start to rely on and trust in every part of your life.

How does the Men's Roundtable work?

Our Men's Roundtable membership gives you access to 3 live group coaching calls per month hosted by Steve and Dan as well as access to over 5 years of previously recorded group coaching calls, an invitation to our private facebook group, and ongoing assignments and resources to help you grow and develop as a confident masculine man. It's like having a personal coach in your pocket, ready to help whenever you need it.

What's the difference between the 1-to-1 coaching and group coaching?

Firstly, anyone who is in our 1-to-1 coaching program automatically receives access to the Men's Roundtable membership and group coaching for free for life. The difference between 1-to-1 and group coaching is down to the speed of change that you want to happen. With more personal time and attention from your coach, the 1-to-1 program is adapted to your specific circumstances and will provide the practical advice you need to know what to think, say and do to create what you want your future to be.

What kind of man is right for your coaching?

We work with men who are willing to take the lead in creating the changes they want in their life and relationships. We only work with men who want to understand their fears, insecurities and shame triggers. We teach you practical ways to deal with the mental and emotional challenges life throws at you and help you reach an unshakeable confidence in yourself (often for the first time in your life).

  • You won’t find negative, hateful language.
  • You won’t find a gender war – we don’t bash women.
  • You won’t find bitching, whining, complaining, and blaming.
  • You won’t find a group of men acting like victims.
  • You won’t find judgment or criticism from others.

We don't waste our time with all those things because we want to take the most efficient and effective path to creating the future you want. So we focus only on the things that are within your control: your thoughts, your words and your actions.

How do I know if I need coaching?

If you are feeling unhappy a lot of the time, if you're lonely, drained, lost, stuck or trapped, then our coaching will help. If you're not sure where your life is headed, if you're not confident in yourself, if you're not sure what you really want in life anymore...our coaching will help.

Whether it’s your job, your intimate relationship, or just wanting to feel more happy and with more purpose, then our coaching will help.

If you are tired of settling for a mediocre life or relationship, tolerating criticism and a lack of fun and intimacy and you're done with placating and playing it safe, then our coaching will help.

We will help you have clarity about what you're REALLY passionate about. We'll get you clear about where you want to be in six months and in six years. We help you figure out what you really want to create vs what other people think you should do.

We help you take action, get unstuck, start moving forward. We help you find what matters instead of just "being busy" in the daily grind. We help you figure out how you're going to get from where you are now to where you want to be.

For many of the guys we work with, they find a peace and a sense of emotional freedom that has them shaking their heads and smiling at how they used to approach life. They feel passionate about life again. They build stronger relationships with the people that matter most to them. They feel satisfied and fulfilled that they have finally found the “right path” forward and life starts to feel fun and inspiring again.

So now you've read that...what do you think? Would YOU like to try some of our coaching for free?

The Hard-to-Swallow Secret to Saving Your Marriage

The Hard-to-Swallow Secret to Saving Your Marriage

This is the secret your dad never told you about – You have more power than you know.

We respect your privacy, read our privacy policy here