Are you struggling in your marriage, having problems and missing your wife’s admiration and respect? I know just how lonely and painful living in that situation feels, but all is not lost, there are ways to start turning things around quicker than you might think.
Relationships go through four stages before real lasting love can be created. Around stage three, most men sense a lack in the relationship. The husband wants to get the marriage back to how it felt in the beginning. He struggles because he can’t get past the resentments and old patterns that have built up in the relationship. To win back your wife’s admiration, affection, and respect something NEW must come from you. We call this stage four of marriage. Let’s look at these stages more closely so you can think clearly about your relationship.
Marriage Stage One
In the beginning of marriage “Phase I” with your wife I bet there was an underlying comfort and certainty that she thought pretty highly of you.
She was probably openly affectionate, admiring and easily receptive to your advances.
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There’s a belief at this point that it will ALWAYS be like this.
Warm, Close. Spontaneous. Safe
THEN POOF!
Marriage Stage Two
You’re into “Phase II” before you know it and barely even noticed that her admiration and respect has been replaced by a dutiful energy of expectation and routine.
You’re into the eat, sleep, mow lawn, pay bills, feed kids, go to work and keep the nose to the grindstone phase. It’s a phase everyone hits. It’s not bad. It can be fulfilling and fun. But it ain’t Phase I. And you’re already wondering if this is all you’ve signed up for.
THEN POOF!
Marriage Stage Three
You wake up one morning to an air of distance, dismissiveness, disrespect and a splash of low grade resentment. It’s in both of you. And you didn’t see it coming. But now you’re concerned. This can’t be good.
Welcome to “Phase III” of your marriage. This is where about half the couples begin their slow decline toward divorce. It’s also where some couples begin a new decade of indifference, disconnection and sadness about their relationship. Some stay in this phase for the rest of their life.
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And some battle their way through it with sense of determination, purpose and intentionality.
These couples are rare. Would you like to learn how to do that?
First watch my short video on what it’s going to take to see if you have it in you.
How to Regain Her Admiration and Respect Again
Win Back Your Wife’s Admiration With Six New Behaviors
The big secret to getting out of stage three in your marriage is to realize that everything you’ve learned to this point is exactly what will keep you stuck here.
As I taught you in the video above, I want you to try something NEW for a change.
Give it 7 days and hold yourself accountable to consistency!
- Don’t overreact or raise your voice no matter what. Don’t take things so personally
- Listen more and talk less
- Stop trying to “be right” about stuff and refuse to argue about stupid things
- Take care of yourself by exercising, connecting with friends and finding something…ANYTHING…to laugh about
- Stop looking to your wife for signs of approval or admiration
- Admire yourself and approve of who you are and how you’re being
I really want to know how it went for you. Seriously!
And more than I care about her reaction to you, I want to know how YOU FELT ABOUT YOU while you were doing it.
Win back your wife’s admiration and respect… by not looking to her for it! Yes. It sounds counter-intuitive. Start feeling better about YOU and how you’re showing up in your relationship. The six new behaviors I listed are the first big step in the journey to getting to Phase IV. Things like affection, respect, safety, and trust cannot be pursued. Those things ensue a man who is being those things. This way of living is incredible to experience!
Evolving Your Marriage Beyond Stage Three
Do you want more respect, admiration and intimacy?
If so, I want you to sign up for a “free, no strings, deep dive and blow your mind coaching session” with me or one of my certified coaches.
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It’s a real conversation. You get to talk and be heard, seen and understood like never before.
You won’t be constantly interrupted while you’re explaining how you feel. Some guys say this one call is more valuable than 12 marriage counseling sessions.
These coaching calls are intensely focused on YOU and YOUR THINKING.
There are not for everyone. But they are perfect for the man willing to try something different…something strangely counter-intuitive.
If you’re ready for a powerful and intensely personal conversation about where you want to go, we’re ready. Get a comfy chair and a cup of coffee. This conversation is NOT a “taster session”.
Contact us to setup a free personalized coaching session. Fill out the unusually personal questions. Be honest. Be thorough.
Let us show you something you didn’t expect.
That’s a promise.