I read a LOT of articles with that title…just to see what they’re saying, of course.
It’s not like I need any more insight. Hell, after 30 yrs. of trying, I should be damn near perfect by now. ;^)
So, these are for you – in case you’re not perfect yet. In case you want to be a man who is “work in progress”.
That’s how I think of myself. Work in progress. It’s a pretty cool place to live.
Okay. Here they are. Ready?
1. Unlearn what you’ve learned
2. Technique doesn’t matter
3. Use your tongue
4. It’s not all about the orgasm
5. It’s not all about YOUR orgasm
These came from an article you can read in the link below.
The thing about this article by Harris O’Malley (a.k.a. Dr. Nerd Love) is that it is written for single guys looking for casual sex. Read “Be the Greatest Lover She’s Ever Known HERE”
What wrong with that? Nothing whatsoever.
The truth is that every bit of advice in this article for SINGLE guys applies to you and me.
It has to do with what you think and what you KNOW about sex.
I’m guessing you’re married or in a committed relationship.
You dream about the ease and “rejection free” environment of casual sex. At some point, most married guys think that being great in the sack would be SO much easier with someone else. Someone who actually acted like they wanted sex with us.
Other articles you may find helpful:Where the Hell Did My Confidence Go? (Maybe you never really had it)
How to Tell if Your Wife Wants Space or a Divorce
What to Do When Your Wife Wants Space
Why is that?
It’s because we believe we already KNOW enough, we just don’t get to PRACTICE enough.
If we could actually “practice”, we could definitely improve our skills and performance, right?
Kind of. But don’t get the cart before the horse.
Competence DOES build confidence. But…
It’s important to become competent in your thinking and your knowledge FIRST. What’s that mean?
What I’ve learned in my own life and with working with men like you is this.
The ability to create awesome intimacy with a woman – any woman – hinges on how she perceives you.
Your thoughts and beliefs about her and sex need to make her FEEL:
• Your DESIRE for her, not your DESPERATION
• You WANT her body, but are not ENTITLED to her body
• Your adoration and commitment is not conditional upon her surrender
• Her pleasure is not secondary to yours
• Sex is not your only option for connecting with her
Your knowledge about her and sex need to make her FEEL:
• Your understanding and respect for her femininity
• Your approach to sex is rooted in knowledge of her needs – not what you’ve seen in porn
• Your intellectual curiosity and appreciation of her special anatomy
• Your awareness and attentiveness to her pleasure points and sexual response
• Your unapologetic desire for continuing your growth as a great lover
Practicing and becoming competent in these skills FIRST is what will build your confidence in becoming the lover you want to be.
THESE are the skills that build the trust AND passion which create the opportunities to practice the techniques.
It is the preoccupation with sexual techniques that will sabotage your ability to create sexual desire.
I work with men on this topic every day. The success stories will make you grin.
What’s the BEST part?
They can’t understand why they didn’t become this guy sooner.
It’s the man they’ve always WANTED to be.
Do you want to take this journey?
Let’s talk. Call or email me today.
Without a mentor who gets you, this is going to take you a WHOLE LOT LONGER than you want it to.