I Think I Married The Wrong Person, What Now?

The holiday season can be brutal for everyone.

I don’t need to list all the irregular crap couples have to endure throughout the season. You know about the stress of the expenses, expectations, travel and unruly relatives.

Many men cringe at all of the drama and don’t know how to cope. It seems the safest route is to just follow orders and try to make everyone happy.

But the “safest” route of trying to “make momma happy” is probably the most ineffective and aggravating energy you could possibly have.

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You feel like you’re treading on eggshells waiting for orders. You find yourself apologizing and asking for permission or direction for making her more happy.

The dirty little secret you have is that you need her to be happy with you.

I want to offer you another mantra.

Instead of “If Momma Ain’t Happy, Ain’t Nobody Happy”, try this on.

“If Daddy Ain’t Happy He Needs Get His Shit Together Because Nobody Else Can Make Him Happy…and if He’s Not Happy Then His Whole World Appears Unhappy and He Will Think His Life Sucks”

I explain this concept and HOW TO STAY IN YOUR LANE in this 4 minute video.

YouTube video

What if Daddy Ain’t Happy?

I coach men about the idea of being the “emotional weatherman” for their family and for themselves.

This means YOU get to decide if the day is going to be emotionally “sunny”, “partly cloudy”, or “full of shit storms”.

The critical life skill every man needs is to define his OWN emotional weather pattern. He does this consciously as he rolls out of bed every single day.

And he does this deliberately with HOW HE RESPONDS to the weather he sees in others.

He must “stay in his lane” if he wants to be a positive influence on anyone else.

And when he finds that some people are just having a “shit storm” day he knows that he doesn’t need to have one too.

When the masculine emotional energy in your house is strong, confident, happy, consistent and predictable you will start to see AMAZING changes around you.

Others will want to be in that lane with you. You will be magnetic.

And you will start to see:

“If Daddy Doesn’t Stay in His Lane He Will End Up in Someone Else’s Lane and He Will Hate That.”

There is ONLY ONE WAY for your masculine emotional energy to become strong, confident, happy, consistent and predictable.

And it is NOT by seeking direction, approval and permission from “momma”.

It happens when you proactively choose to spend time with men who are already driving in that lane.

It happens when you decide that lane is for you and nothing will keep you from getting there.

There are so many things to know about your own insecure triggers…your own anger…and you’re own immature reactions. (I’ve driven in those lanes…no fun at all.)

There is so much to know about the emotional world of women and their incessant mind monkey chatter and internal shame triggers.

Once you start learning this stuff you will feel a rush of relief and competence in handling your own happiness.

I was going to put in a testimonial next, but 3 minutes ago a guy commented on the video above.

Well said Steve. My wife started coming back to me just like you had said. Now good days and bad days sometimes, but your right. SO WHAT?!

What he has learned is that when he stays in his happy, positive, confident lane…everyone, including his wife, wants to be there too.

We’ve created many options for you to get this knowledge and support so you can be consistent and really, really LIKE YOURSELF as you’re doing the work.

The next step for you is to make a courageous, no nonsense decision to connect with me and my coaches to start 2021 off with a bang.

If you want to get serious in 2021 about becoming that man, we want to speak with you personally.

We want to spend at least an hour at first to hear your voice, learn about your dreams and coach you through some of the barriers in front of you.

On this call we can offer you immediate tips to help you feel calmer…cooler…and more relaxed and measured in your emotions.

We can give you details about the options you have for going deeper in 2021 to transform yourself and your intimate relationship.

At the end of the call we fully expect you to say what other men have said.

“Damn, this felt better than a year of counseling! I can’t believe someone really listened to me and understands exactly who I am and where I am!”.

How do you set up this call?

Simple.

Click HERE to go to the application for your free consultation. We want to know some things about you first and will schedule the call right away. You will be matched up with either to me or one of my certified coaches around the world.

You’re not alone brother. I promise.

author avatar
Steve Horsmon Certified Professional Men’s Coach
Steve Horsmon is a Certified Professional Life Coach and owner of Goodguys2Greatmen Relationship Coaching in Livermore, Colorado. He has appeared on well known coachign and psychology television, radio, youtube, and podcast channels related to maintaining healthy relationships. Steve provides intensely personal, action oriented coaching services for men through 1-on-1 coaching, private retreats and workshops designed to give men new knowledge, skills and mindset to achieve their relationship goals. He is a committed, lifelong mentor who teaches his clients to discover their masculine power, take bold action and create the life they want. He has written articles and guest blogs for numerous relationship and expert websites.

Frequently Asked Questions


Is our coaching right for you?

Our coaching process was created for men who want to feel happier and more fulfilled in their life and relationships. We teach you how to have more confidence and clarity about what you want in your life and create an action plan to start making it happen.

Do you only work with men in marriage?

While our coaching teaches you how to create a more connected, more fun and passionate marriage, we also work with you to have more clarity, enthusiasm and fulfillment in all areas of your life. We help you understand what you really want your future to look like and we also teach you how to be in control of your emotions so that you can be confident and assertive no matter how difficult your circumstances are right now .

What happens in the free 90-minute coaching call?

In our free initial coaching calls, we listen a lot, we ask you questions to understand what life is really like for you at the moment, we help you identify what you want to be different and what's holding you back from creating those changes now. Then we help you create a practical plan of action to start moving forward straight away.

What will I learn in your coaching programs?

We take you through a process to:

  • Stop being tentative and become more focused and directed.
  • Develop control over your thoughts and emotions like never before.
  • Become a master of the masculine and feminine dance required for a more passionate connection in your romantic relationships.
  • Build and sustain your personal masculine confidence so that you don't get "triggered" or feel disrespected and can respond with strength and confidence to any situation.
  • Become more connected, aware and present with everyone (this is a critical step in your ability to build attraction and desire as well as have people trust you and respect you more).
  • Stop the destructive emotions of anger and resentment which keep you going around in frustrating cycles and start from moving forward with purpose.
  • Stop being anxious, needy and overly reliant upon other people's opinions and approval of you and start feeling more peace, happiness and a deep sense of being a man who is confident in himself again.
  • You will become a confident man who knows his values, what he wants and where he’s going in his life.
  • You will learn how to think, speak and act according to your values without worrying about reactions from others.
  • You become clear and confident in your ability to create intimacy whenever you want.
  • Your confidence will be something that you start to rely on and trust in every part of your life.

How does the Men's Roundtable work?

Our Men's Roundtable membership gives you access to 3 live group coaching calls per month hosted by Steve and Dan as well as access to over 5 years of previously recorded group coaching calls, an invitation to our private facebook group, and ongoing assignments and resources to help you grow and develop as a confident masculine man. It's like having a personal coach in your pocket, ready to help whenever you need it.

What's the difference between the 1-to-1 coaching and group coaching?

Firstly, anyone who is in our 1-to-1 coaching program automatically receives access to the Men's Roundtable membership and group coaching for free for life. The difference between 1-to-1 and group coaching is down to the speed of change that you want to happen. With more personal time and attention from your coach, the 1-to-1 program is adapted to your specific circumstances and will provide the practical advice you need to know what to think, say and do to create what you want your future to be.

What kind of man is right for your coaching?

We work with men who are willing to take the lead in creating the changes they want in their life and relationships. We only work with men who want to understand their fears, insecurities and shame triggers. We teach you practical ways to deal with the mental and emotional challenges life throws at you and help you reach an unshakeable confidence in yourself (often for the first time in your life).

  • You won’t find negative, hateful language.
  • You won’t find a gender war – we don’t bash women.
  • You won’t find bitching, whining, complaining, and blaming.
  • You won’t find a group of men acting like victims.
  • You won’t find judgment or criticism from others.

We don't waste our time with all those things because we want to take the most efficient and effective path to creating the future you want. So we focus only on the things that are within your control: your thoughts, your words and your actions.

How do I know if I need coaching?

If you are feeling unhappy a lot of the time, if you're lonely, drained, lost, stuck or trapped, then our coaching will help. If you're not sure where your life is headed, if you're not confident in yourself, if you're not sure what you really want in life anymore...our coaching will help.

Whether it’s your job, your intimate relationship, or just wanting to feel more happy and with more purpose, then our coaching will help.

If you are tired of settling for a mediocre life or relationship, tolerating criticism and a lack of fun and intimacy and you're done with placating and playing it safe, then our coaching will help.

We will help you have clarity about what you're REALLY passionate about. We'll get you clear about where you want to be in six months and in six years. We help you figure out what you really want to create vs what other people think you should do.

We help you take action, get unstuck, start moving forward. We help you find what matters instead of just "being busy" in the daily grind. We help you figure out how you're going to get from where you are now to where you want to be.

For many of the guys we work with, they find a peace and a sense of emotional freedom that has them shaking their heads and smiling at how they used to approach life. They feel passionate about life again. They build stronger relationships with the people that matter most to them. They feel satisfied and fulfilled that they have finally found the “right path” forward and life starts to feel fun and inspiring again.

So now you've read that...what do you think? Would YOU like to try some of our coaching for free?

The Hard-to-Swallow Secret to Saving Your Marriage

The Hard-to-Swallow Secret to Saving Your Marriage

This is the secret your dad never told you about – You have more power than you know.

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