A well-dressed man sat on a park bench with his shoulders slumped. He was frequently seen sitting alone the last few weeks. His job was no longer interesting. His free time was no longer exciting. If you asked him why he was so sad, he had a clear reason: “my wife left me“. I’m going to share how to move on after your wife leaves. This is a process of spending time with other men committed to personal change. Men who’ve shifted their view from a place of lack and uncertainty to a place of trust and excitement!
Earlier this week I was talking to a man…no a GREAT man I know, who in the last 14 months has lost his wife, his house, 50% of his time with his beautiful two young daughters and a hefty amount of money to boot.
Why do I call him a great man?
Because 14 months after hearing “I love you, but I’m not in love with you” – one of the most painful moments a man can go through – he sat there telling me how he’s so grateful.
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It’s not that this journey wasn’t difficult and painful for him.
But along the way he found out what he truly has to offer as a man and a human.
He found out that he has the ability to fully control his relationship to his circumstances.
In 14 months, he has read upwards of 40 books.
He’s learned why his relationship wasn’t meeting HIS needs and why not standing up for what he wanted in life had made him unhappy.
He’s learned what makes him motivated, enthusiastic and passionate.
He’s clear about what his future looks like and is making progress EVERY DAY toward creating that future now.
His name is Mark.
Mark told me about a conversation he’d recently had with another man looking for answers when going through a tough time in his life.
In this conversation Mark mentioned Goodguys2Greatmen and how our coaching and community have helped him.
The guy’s response was “Oh yeah, I’ve heard of them, taking advantage of men when they’re vulnerable and hurting.”
I totally get why someone would think that.
I even have some shame come up when I think that someone could be right when they say that.
“Am I ripping people off?”
“Do I provide enough value?”
“Should I just give up and let someone better take over?”
But then I remember WHY Steve and I do this.
We work with men in pain and suffering, yes.
But we also work with men in joy and happiness, fulfilment and growth.
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In fact, it’s that journey…from pain to pleasure, boredom to passion, disconnection to excitement, self-doubt to confidence…which is such a remarkable transformation that it gets to us both, every time.
View your options in life from a place of trust and excitement Rather Then lack and uncertainty
It makes all the hardships he’s been through totally worth it.
It makes him cry and it makes us cry too – this time with happiness.
And it was true for both Steve and I too.
This work we do with men is the same path that we both had to take.
First pain, then growth, then pleasure.
It’s the frustrating truth about life that the most important lessons often come in the form of challenges, of failures, of mistakes and sudden, unforeseen changes.
And it’s HOW YOU RESPOND that makes all the difference.
Sometimes we need a guide, a mentor, or a coach to help us see the right path forward.
Both Steve and I did too. There’s no shame in asking for help.
“Reaching out to you was the best gift I ever gave to myself, it changed everything for me.”
As men we totally get that we can support and challenge each other to grow in the world of exercise and work but when it comes to love, to emotions, to being a better lover or father, we get scared.
Men don’t reach out for help when their relationships falter.
Mostly we numb the pain with alcohol, exercise, other drugs or porn.
Ask me how I know…
Here at Goodguys2Greatmen we don’t f*ck around.
We don’t apologize.
We work with men in pain, in fear of losing their marriages, their kids, their jobs and even their lives.
Sometimes there are things you want to say, that you’ve always wanted to say, but you don’t.
You might have a dream in your mind about how you want to become a better lover or challenge your partner into a deeper more passionate relationship…but you’re not saying it out loud.
We play small and avoid looking in the direction of our discomfort. We let the fear control our potential.
And the sad thing is that most men never do say what they want to say or make the move toward a new future vision.
I’ll admit – I needed some high quality men in my life.
I had no idea what that even was…a high quality or initiated man…wtf?
But when you experience a conversation with one of these men, you know it.
They know exactly what you’re going through and they can see what you need.
It’s a difficult edge for us to push though.
Connecting with men.
Really connecting, not just small talk about sports or cars or work.
Talking openly with someone about what you feel and where you’re struggling.
There’s a reason it feels hard.
There’s a reason it feels scary.
That reason is fear.
Fear of rejection.
Fear of being laughed at.
Fear of judgement and criticism.
But the truth is, we all feel that fear.
My willingness to show you that I feel the same fear you do creates the trust for me to help you through it
The key to getting through it is connecting with other men.
Great men who’ve got your back.
A man who will be there when you need someone to talk to when you’re feeling afraid or anxious.
Who can tell you when you need to back off a little.
Or when you need to lean in more.
Or hold you accountable when you need to push through when everything else is telling you to give up.
A great man can help you understand how to make the very smallest little changes in the way you’re showing up, that will have the biggest impact on your life.
Real change only happens when we push ourselves into the zone of discomfort.
What have you got to lose?
You can stay where you are and hope somebody else changes.
Or you can learn how to know when it’s time to take a stand, speak up and risk pissing other people off.
For that you need support and guidance.
You’ll never find that just in a book, video or podcast.
What worked for me is what will work for you.
“When My Wife Left Me I Discovered I Was Going To Be Ok by Spending Dedicated Time With Other Initiated Men”
Who says that? Men in our community do. Men who are committed to personal change.
This is how you get the fire back in your belly.
This is how your enthusiasm for life is reborn.
This is how you reignite the passion in your relationship.
We help men do these things every day.
And there’s nothing else we would rather do than to spend some quality time helping you do that.
We end up laughing together more than anything else.
Here’s a video of Steve and some of the great men at a recent gathering, supporting, caring for, loving each other….not giving a fuck what anyone else thinks of them:
Let go of my ears I know what I’m doing
You have to talk to other men, because you DO have a need to talk about this stuff. You need to communicate, to vent and be vulnerable, and talk about your fears
It’s about the incredible breakthroughs we make when men team up and work together.
It’s about feeling heard and understood maybe for the first time ever.
It’s about that calm, confident, peaceful feeling we get when we see the truth about our masculine power and ability to live what we dream.
And it’s about creating new connections and a support network most men don’t have before they die.
We want you to feel like a strong, calm, confident and clear-headed man.
We want you to relax in situations that make normal men crazy.
We want you to grin with the knowledge you’re being who you want to be and you’re creating the life and love you want.
Is this a sales pitch?
Hell yes it’s a sales pitch!
We love what we do.
We love watching men transform and become happy, confident men with swagger and a smile.
We love helping them stand up tall in their relationship and start becoming the man and partner they have always wanted to be.
That’s what we’re selling.
We believe in YOU more than you may believe in yourself right now.
Sometimes that’s all it takes to help a man find that switch and start making exponential improvements.
Every man we talk to is struggling and gripped by fear or self-doubt.
It’s so common and yet none of us talk to each other about it!!
If you’re feeling, scared, rejected, dismissed, ignored, replaced, inadequate, frustrated, uncertain or just plain confused, we want to speak to you.
I want you to feel that you have a brother, a wise mentor in your corner, someone who will challenge you to stop holding back and start moving forward.
We talk about what’s really happening with your marriage, wife and sex life.
We tell you things about being a man your father never told you…and how you’ve been avoiding the most powerful part of being a man.
We take you through an exercise to experience the thrill of changing your perspective on your circumstances and THAT immediately changes how you feel about your options.
After my wife left, I struggled to see how I could ever be happy again. Then I discovered the support of men committed to learning new mindsets. Mindsets that create trust, abundance and excitement! These are key factors to creating happiness in your personal life. Happiness that spreads out into your other relationships.
Perhaps the most courageous, decisive and masculine thing you can do right now is to ask for a free call.
Let us show you something you didn’t know.
You literally have nothing to lose and a whole lot to gain.
In our coaching we take men through an intense program to become the man you were always meant to be. It’s a process of rediscovering your enthusiasm for life and it changes who you as a man.
Some ways for you to learn how to change how you think about your options are:
The Men’s Live Coaching Roundtable is a powerful collection of men from around the world working together to transform themselves and their relationships. Steve and I lead this community with 5 other professional coaches. We have live coaching video calls twice per month. The support and camaraderie in this group is something missing from the lives of too many men in the world.
The How to Defuse the Divorce Bomb course is a deep and intense dive into handling yourself when you hear, “I love you but I’m not in love with you anymore.”
We love teaching men these tools – how to be better, how to know who you are, own your power, know what you want and know how to CREATE it in your life through our Masculine Confidence coaching programs.
What if this next year everything changed for you?
That’s what we want for you.
