Since I don’t have kids, I don’t normally give much parenting advice. Although the “man skills” I teach are totally transferable to parenting nothing beats a great true story to illustrate a point.
My buddy, Jeff, told me a story today about his unruly 15-year-old who went ballistic when Jeff took his phone away.
I don’t just mean ballistic. I mean all out warfare.
What do you do when someone with a 15-year-old mindset and maturity does something so outrageous that you feel like throwing him through a wall?
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I found out the answer today when Jeff shared this great story. I love how he handled it.
Jeff Allen is the owner of The Allen School of Self-Mastery. He helps frustrated dads and their sons who are debilitated by anger, anxiety and emotional shutdown. These fathers and sons learn a whole new way of being more present and self-aware. Jeff teaches them critical coping and thinking skills to be more like cool, calm Ninja’s than emotional, over-reactive basket cases.
The result?
More confidence. More maturity. More connection. More father and son fun! Bottom line: More love.
Instead of me typing out the story, I asked Jeff to tell you about it in this video we made while having lunch in Fort Collins.
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I love this guy and his passion for helping dads and their boys.
How does this apply to conflict with your wife?
I’m hoping that is self evident.
It is not about being her “daddy”. It’s about staying in your cool, calm, confident “ninja skin” and stop over-reacting.
You need to be more present and aware of what’s REALLY going on.
This is the critical skill of maintaining composure while standing firm around your principles.
It involves more listening than talking.
Most of all…it requires patience. Mountain Lion patience.
All of us (women and men) are in our 15 year old mindset when our emotions are ruling our behaviour.
You can do this. You must.
It’s your ticket to self-induced happiness and peace of mind.
And it totally changes the dynamic is ALL of your relationships.
Jeff is also one of our Goodguys2Greatmen certified coaches, so if you relate to his story and you’re ready to finally get the confidence, clarity and skills to move like a ninja in your life and relationship, maybe it’s time for you to ask for some help.
“Real men” actually CAN ask for directions. (though I still resist it until it’s absolutely necessary!)
You can go to THIS CONTACT FORM to request your private, one-hour “Find Your Inner Ninja Consultation” with me or Coach Dan Dore in the UK.
Some guys say this hour is more beneficial than their last 5 marriage counselling sessions.
How can you have ninja levels of self-confidence and be able to stay consistent and secure in your self-esteem even when you’re in the middle of a rejection or a conflict?
That’s what we help guys understand and start living here at Goodguys2Greatmen. That’s our passion.
We want to help you rediscover the aliveness that’s available in your future.
We want you to know that the pain that you may be feeling right now doesn’t define you. It doesn’t define your future. You have more control than you think.
We’d love to have a conversation with you about this.
When we have a conversation, they can go 60 or 90 minutes and we cover everything that’s going on in your life. Everything she’s said, everything you’re feeling…
And what we want you to do, is walk away from this phone call, feeling like you have a glimmer of hope, that maybe the way you were thinking before the call was driving you into a pit of despair and we want to pull you out of that, at least for a day.
How do you learn how to be calm, confident and rejection proof?
It’s done with the help of other men who have traveled your path. You must surround yourself with men who can help you change your mindset, your perspective and, ultimately, how you FEEL ABOUT YOU.
The problem most of us have is that we have no men in our lives to talk to about this who get it, have been through it and come out the other side. We’ve got nobody we can trust to give us clear feedback and positive support and guidance.
So what’s next?
I’ve created a powerfully EFFECTIVE experience and for you that promises to give you the calm, confident, peaceful mojo you want.
The very FASTEST way to change the way you’re thinking and find your confidence again is to join other men doing the same thing.
Here are some options for you to join us and start creating a whole new reality for yourself:
The Men’s Live Coaching Roundtable is a powerful collection of men from around the world working together to transform themselves and their relationships. Dan Dore and I lead this community with 5 other professional coaches. We have live coaching video calls twice per month. The camaraderie in this group is something missing from the lives of too many men in the world.
The MEXICO MOJO MASTERY retreat for March 2020 is now 40% full! This is an advanced retreat for men who have had one-on-one coaching or have attended other retreats.and we can’t wait to meet up again in Punta Mita at the Hacienda Alegra. Click that link for some mind-blowing pics.
We love teaching men these tools – how to be better, how to know who you are, what you stand for, what you want and how to CREATE it in your life through our Masculine Confidence coaching programs.
What if this next year everything changed for you?
That’s what we want for you brother.
My new book Straight Talk Tools for the Desperate Husband will help you to lead yourself and your relationship back to good health. Understand why your partner acts the way she does toward you and learn how to lead your life in the direction you want it to go. You CAN have the relationship you want, fulfilling all your desires while maintaining love and respect.
I wrote a free e-book to help men learn how to lose their fear and be more bold in their marriage to create the love and connection they want. Get The Hard to Swallow Truth About Saving Your Marriage.