Wife Is Not Sexually Attracted To Me Anymore What Can I Do?

Over my years as a men’s coach, there’s one thing I see over and over again when a wife is not sexually attracted to her husband anymore…he needs to learn how his energy and mood are affecting her libido.

If you spend much time feeling anxious, agitated, irritated, overwhelmed or angry…I can accurately predict that you aren’t having much sex right now, yes?

Why?

Simple. When you’re feeling those emotions, she will be feeling them and while it would be wonderful for her to lean in and offer to support you through them, that’s not the reaction that most women have in their body. Especially when you are blaming her for your negative emotional state.

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Are you blaming her?

So how do you become a calmer, more attractive man (even when sex is off the table right now…)

I know what you’re thinking. But sometimes sex is the BEST remedy for emotions like anxiety or overwhelm.

I agree! But if your mood is really shitty at the moment, self-remedy is probably the only good option.

Relax And Be Your Normal, Sexy Self Again

I have no idea how YOU do it. I only know about me and I’ll share that below.

Today I started getting anxious, pissed, overwhelmed and agitated over something I had no control over…

…a power outage that lasted about 2 hours.

I know, it’s not a big deal, but I had work to do. Internet was down – the phone was down and I even got kicked off a video call I was on.

Then I remembered an email I received a couple of days ago.

It was from a guy who listened to this Guided Meditation Audio I did a few years ago. I almost forgot about it.

He said he loved it and shared his experience listening to it. He said, “WOW, what a center I found, a place of calm.”

I thought, “Damn, why didn’t I think of that? And it’s my own damn meditation.”

As I explain in this video, one way to deal with a pattern of anxiety, agitation and anger is to imagine a better version of yourself.

Imagine being “that guy” you picture in your head.

That calm, cool, deliberate and amused man you’d love to be but keep sabotaging yourself.

It’s a battle we all fight, brother. Do it for you and nobody else!

Click this link to listen to: “Being That Guy” It’s about a personal story I’ll never forget.

YouTube video

How to Handle Anger and Anxiety and Be a Sexier Man

Will Meditation Actually Help If She’s Giving Less Sex?

Not all by itself… But I can guarantee if you don’t learn how to relax – be more calm and confident – and stop REACTING to triggers instead of RESPONDING to them…sex will be very hard to come by.

First things first. Get yourself out of a shitty mood without her needing to do it for you. Do the mediation I shared. It’s just one tool to help you be the sexy man you know you are when she’s giving less sex. If your sex life doesn’t improve, contact us for a free coaching call where we’ll help you identify what kind of man you need to BE to HAVE what you want.

author avatar
Steve Horsmon Certified Professional Men’s Coach
Steve Horsmon is a Certified Professional Life Coach and owner of Goodguys2Greatmen Relationship Coaching in Livermore, Colorado. He has appeared on well known coachign and psychology television, radio, youtube, and podcast channels related to maintaining healthy relationships. Steve provides intensely personal, action oriented coaching services for men through 1-on-1 coaching, private retreats and workshops designed to give men new knowledge, skills and mindset to achieve their relationship goals. He is a committed, lifelong mentor who teaches his clients to discover their masculine power, take bold action and create the life they want. He has written articles and guest blogs for numerous relationship and expert websites.

Frequently Asked Questions


Is our coaching right for you?

Our coaching process was created for men who want to feel happier and more fulfilled in their life and relationships. We teach you how to have more confidence and clarity about what you want in your life and create an action plan to start making it happen.

Do you only work with men in marriage?

While our coaching teaches you how to create a more connected, more fun and passionate marriage, we also work with you to have more clarity, enthusiasm and fulfillment in all areas of your life. We help you understand what you really want your future to look like and we also teach you how to be in control of your emotions so that you can be confident and assertive no matter how difficult your circumstances are right now .

What happens in the free 90-minute coaching call?

In our free initial coaching calls, we listen a lot, we ask you questions to understand what life is really like for you at the moment, we help you identify what you want to be different and what's holding you back from creating those changes now. Then we help you create a practical plan of action to start moving forward straight away.

What will I learn in your coaching programs?

We take you through a process to:

  • Stop being tentative and become more focused and directed.
  • Develop control over your thoughts and emotions like never before.
  • Become a master of the masculine and feminine dance required for a more passionate connection in your romantic relationships.
  • Build and sustain your personal masculine confidence so that you don't get "triggered" or feel disrespected and can respond with strength and confidence to any situation.
  • Become more connected, aware and present with everyone (this is a critical step in your ability to build attraction and desire as well as have people trust you and respect you more).
  • Stop the destructive emotions of anger and resentment which keep you going around in frustrating cycles and start from moving forward with purpose.
  • Stop being anxious, needy and overly reliant upon other people's opinions and approval of you and start feeling more peace, happiness and a deep sense of being a man who is confident in himself again.
  • You will become a confident man who knows his values, what he wants and where he’s going in his life.
  • You will learn how to think, speak and act according to your values without worrying about reactions from others.
  • You become clear and confident in your ability to create intimacy whenever you want.
  • Your confidence will be something that you start to rely on and trust in every part of your life.

How does the Men's Roundtable work?

Our Men's Roundtable membership gives you access to 3 live group coaching calls per month hosted by Steve and Dan as well as access to over 5 years of previously recorded group coaching calls, an invitation to our private facebook group, and ongoing assignments and resources to help you grow and develop as a confident masculine man. It's like having a personal coach in your pocket, ready to help whenever you need it.

What's the difference between the 1-to-1 coaching and group coaching?

Firstly, anyone who is in our 1-to-1 coaching program automatically receives access to the Men's Roundtable membership and group coaching for free for life. The difference between 1-to-1 and group coaching is down to the speed of change that you want to happen. With more personal time and attention from your coach, the 1-to-1 program is adapted to your specific circumstances and will provide the practical advice you need to know what to think, say and do to create what you want your future to be.

What kind of man is right for your coaching?

We work with men who are willing to take the lead in creating the changes they want in their life and relationships. We only work with men who want to understand their fears, insecurities and shame triggers. We teach you practical ways to deal with the mental and emotional challenges life throws at you and help you reach an unshakeable confidence in yourself (often for the first time in your life).

  • You won’t find negative, hateful language.
  • You won’t find a gender war – we don’t bash women.
  • You won’t find bitching, whining, complaining, and blaming.
  • You won’t find a group of men acting like victims.
  • You won’t find judgment or criticism from others.

We don't waste our time with all those things because we want to take the most efficient and effective path to creating the future you want. So we focus only on the things that are within your control: your thoughts, your words and your actions.

How do I know if I need coaching?

If you are feeling unhappy a lot of the time, if you're lonely, drained, lost, stuck or trapped, then our coaching will help. If you're not sure where your life is headed, if you're not confident in yourself, if you're not sure what you really want in life anymore...our coaching will help.

Whether it’s your job, your intimate relationship, or just wanting to feel more happy and with more purpose, then our coaching will help.

If you are tired of settling for a mediocre life or relationship, tolerating criticism and a lack of fun and intimacy and you're done with placating and playing it safe, then our coaching will help.

We will help you have clarity about what you're REALLY passionate about. We'll get you clear about where you want to be in six months and in six years. We help you figure out what you really want to create vs what other people think you should do.

We help you take action, get unstuck, start moving forward. We help you find what matters instead of just "being busy" in the daily grind. We help you figure out how you're going to get from where you are now to where you want to be.

For many of the guys we work with, they find a peace and a sense of emotional freedom that has them shaking their heads and smiling at how they used to approach life. They feel passionate about life again. They build stronger relationships with the people that matter most to them. They feel satisfied and fulfilled that they have finally found the “right path” forward and life starts to feel fun and inspiring again.

So now you've read that...what do you think? Would YOU like to try some of our coaching for free?

The Hard-to-Swallow Secret to Saving Your Marriage

The Hard-to-Swallow Secret to Saving Your Marriage

This is the secret your dad never told you about – You have more power than you know.

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