Hey brother,
You’ll notice these words I’m typing are often the same words you’ll hear in the video. Everyone has different learning preferences.
So pick your learning style now…reading, watching or just listening.
I’m going to explain why, after ALL THE WORK YOU’VE DONE, things may STILL not be as totally awesome as you were expecting.
The 3-Step Emergency Triage for You AND Your Marriage >>
In the context of teaching men who want to create better lives and better relationships, there is a danger of constantly thinking, “Am I there yet?”
Along with that are the thoughts:
- Does anyone notice how much I’ve done or how hard I’ve worked?
- When is somebody going to worry about MY needs?
- Why won’t she work as hard as I am on this stuff?
- Why aren’t we having more of everything as I expected would happen?
- What else should I be doing?!
- After EVERYTHING I’ve read and everything I’ve changed, why don’t I feel AWESOMER?
A good friend of mine is dating a woman who claims to be suffering from her last relationship. She got dumped by a guy and she claims to have some trauma related to that.
She’s a full-time yoga teacher, meditator, mentor, mushroom voyager, voracious reader and dedicated “breath worker”.
And when my buddy told me about all of the drama, uncertainty, ambivalence and anxiety she was having with the idea of committing to a deeper relationship, he joked,
“Jeez, with all that breath work you’d think she’d be a little farther along!”
Free Guide: Where You Should Focus To Grow Your Masculinity >>
She’s like a lot of the men who first come into the GG2GM community and start “doing the work”. She believes that by pouring on MORE WORK she will eventually unscramble her monkey mind and start to feel clear and normal again.
You know what is more powerful than doing MORE WORK…more sustainable than reading more books…more effective than struggling through another agonizing marriage counseling session?
Doing nothing at all…that’s what.
Why is this true?
Because for most people, all of that “work” is keeping you from being who you really are.
You’re not a drama filled, anxious, indecisive man. You just THINK you are. So stop trying so hard.
Stop “working” so hard.
Stop distracting yourself with activity that is keeping you from simply sitting quietly, calmly, and peacefully saying out loud…“You know what? I’m actually okay. She’s okay. We’re going to be okay.”
Why does that help?
Because it’s true.
It’s time to give yourself some grace, some space, some patience, some humor and some fun.
You’re not broken, so just stop trying to fix yourself.
Stop trying to manipulate and control future outcomes over which you have no control.
When you stop working so hard, you finally start thinking more clearly, speaking your truth more boldly and taking courageous actions you’ve been afraid of. It’s THIS stuff that actually changes your life.
This is a life skill. It’s what we teach men who are ready to do just enough work to learn the truth about themselves, their marriage and their future.
*****
Are you ready to learn this stuff before another decade passes?
We’ve created the smartest and safest place on earth for men to gather. It’s where we share, listen and LEARN THE THINGS OUR DADS FORGOT TO TEACH US.
Free: If you’re serious about building your masculine mojo then apply for a coaching call with us we will help you identify what to focus on and what to avoid to get you feeling confident again.
What do I mean by “SERIOUS”?
- We take YOU and your struggles seriously…because we’ve been there
- We know living in a sexless marriage is serious…and so is showing your kids what a healthy affectionate relationship looks like
- A lack of intimacy of all kinds is serious now and for the long term health of your marriage
- We believe your personal emotional strength and well-being is serious
- We seriously show up 110% to our conversations with you and expect you to be as serious as we are about changing your life
Free Guide: Where You Should Focus To Grow Your Masculinity
$69 Monthly Subscription: Join Dan and I in our Men’s Roundtable Group Coaching membership. We meet three times per month for live group coaching and we support you in a powerful group of men facing the same issues you are. Get instant access to 5 years of recorded sessions. Try it for one month. What have you got to lose?
$397 One-Time Payment: How to Defuse the Divorce Bomb is a self-paced course with me, Tim Wade, and a community of men learning how to lead when you’ve just heard, “I love you but I’m not in love with you” or “I want to separate or divorce.”
As Teddy Roosevelt said:
“In any moment of decision, the best thing you can do is the right thing, the next best thing is the wrong thing, and the worst thing you can do is nothing.”
